Wednesday, November 17, 2010

I ♥ Steven Colbert

After my tight-underwear experience in Detroit, I just love what Steven Colbert said the last night:
What if I started... let the free market take care of it... if I started an airline called "Zero Security Airlines". It's like, "Skip the Line! Get on Board! It's Zero Security Airlines!" And our symbol would be rolling dice.
Yeah... exactly. Sign me up for their frequent flier program.
UPDATE:

A commenter notes that there is already exactly that type of airline flying: Seaport Air. It even says right on their front page,
"No lines. No rubber gloves. No need to take your shoes off. Simply arrive 15 minutes before your flight, board and go. It's air travel the way it should be - fast and hassle-free."
Granted, they only fly to about 10 airports... and all munincipal airports from the looks of it. But: You go, Seaport Air!

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

The safest way to fly;

Carry two bombs aboard the plane with you. The odds of three bombs on the same plane are astronomical.

Mike Farrell
Cagayan de Oro

Anonymous said...

Colbert is the epitome of a castrated wise-ass.Quick with his mouth but can never deliver the goods who after a while becomes as annoying as the jackass in the barn who will never reproduce.

Jungle Jil said...

Anon 11:33: Yours is really just the grown-up version of a teenager's "that sucks". It's just a bunch of words that really don't say anything. Take the time to explain your point instead of just blah-blahing in vague and smoky generalizations that anybody could say about anybody else.

Anonymous said...

A security free airlines already exists. No TSA, no checks, just show up and get on the plane. I have not heard any terrorists bringing any of their planes down.
http://www.seaportair.com/

Anonymous said...

the point was quickly stated.Didnt think it needed clarification.But,it said this:he is a wise-ass(he knows it and gets paid to be it).he is quick with his mouth,just like a wise-ass(and gets paid to be it),get it?.And he figuratively has no balls(he is censored,and paid to be it).So,while he can spout off about his airline,it will never happen,just like the annoying jackass in the barn that will never re-produce(but makes alot of noise)get it?.not smoky,nor generalized and not everybody can fit into that shoe(u know,the thing on your foot).not blah-blahing but fact facting w/out the explanation.Or this one:The guy is paid to sound intelligently funny with his quick remarks about things that won't happen,cant be done while pointing out what is wrong and suggesting a funny alternative that doesnt exist.He ends up the annoying jack-ass,appealing to those people in the U.S.who think they are educated enough to follow along,agree or disagree with his useless rantings,and say things like'sign me up for that''I remember when..' knowing(?)it is wishful thinking.The same applies to the likes of Dennis Miller,Glen Beck,Sarah Palin.They are the ones with the smoky generalizations and vague notions of what is wrong and how to fix it(but not really!).I liked the previous, quicker version.It said exactly what it was meant to say about Senor Colbert,accurately as well and with a dash of humor that was meant to give it its bravado,panache.Analogic as it may have been it was not meant to sound like some sort of asshole logic but rather quick to the point.To avoid any useless meanderings that could be mis-interpreted in any tangently related field thus creating permutations that could lead the reader far away from the intrinsic value of the less is more spirit of the strategically composed message.If it produced a feeling of alienation to the point of frustration at having read the aforementioned message and not being able to comprehend its anologies as they were to deep for the fragile egg-shell mind that was too shattered to comprehend the complexities involved,it was not intended.Expounding on that could be a total waste of time.DID YOU REALLY NOT GET IT?

Jungle Jil said...

It makes no difference whether or not I possess the skills to read between your first post's lines to suss out what you might have been thinking.

Rather, I was interested as to whether or not you had the reasoning skills; the thoughts put into; and opinions formulated on the subject with which to buttress your off-hand remarks.

Now I know.

By the way, I especially like the happenstance juxtaposition of your comment about how Colbert is an "annoying jackass" because his "fantasy airline" will never happen right below the comment that says that there already is an airline exactly like the one that Colbert dreamed of.

Anonymous said...

Colbert's airline doesn't exist.I didnt even read the next paragraph.I dont care about it, seaiar nor have I ever heard of them.mixing-up the sequence of statements,shoving them together to make a point,NOT IMPRESSIVE.Where did you learn that one,critical thinking 101?get an A+ did ya?

Jungle Jil said...

An A- actually...

It's like, "Skip the Line! Get on Board! It's Zero Security Airlines!"

"No lines. No rubber gloves. No need to take your shoes off. Simply arrive 15 minutes before your flight, board and go."

But that's beyond the point. You're failing to improve on your original attempt to make any sort of point in this discussion. What you've said about Steven Colbert could apply just as easily to Bob Hope, Jerry Lewis, or any other comedian in the history of the world. It's specious and irrelevant boilerplate you're writing. Just because you write more of it in greater detail doesn't improve upon its "truthiness."

Anonymous said...

it wasnt refered to as a fantasy airline in anything I wrote.ur obviously the 'I have never lost an argument'type.the type whose low-self esteem will turn anything into an argument no matter how much a waste of time it is.Even mentioning the A- was pretty much what I would expect from one such as you,responding to another off-hand remark as if it is something to make a point about.you seem to think that anyone who reads your blog cares a great deal about all of it and that you are the superior intellect,and must prove it every time.specious irrelevant boilerplate writing is what it was supposed to be,that is what opinions are.I almost cant believe you even wasted your time responding to the useless,long winded and especially contrived(by design!)response to your bordering on insulting reply to an opinin about the annoying jackass that is Stephen Colbert,but realizing the type of low-self esteem braggart you are proving you self to be you are merely:typical.I am a guest on this blog so I will suffice to say this:U r not the only person with an education and proving it to you would on a subject as useless,insignificant as Colbear would be as nonsensical,useless as beating you in a game of chess,in less than 10 minutes.Your condescending remarks and your superior tone,not to mention your advanced use of adjectives,as un-impressive as it is,on a matter as useless,insignificant as Stephen Colbert are laughable.Congratualations on everything,the applause must be deafening,a debate,about an annoying comedian,w/someone you dont know,won w/out even breaking a sweat.

Jungle Jil said...

Actually, this blog... and the readers it draws in... is here for my entertainment and vanity alone. Really... what else could such a self-indulgent monument to my life, my "superior intellect", my views (and my "low self-esteem") be?

That others find this blog (and the readers like you that it draws in) entertaining is merely a bonus to that primary function.

Thank you for participating. You didn't really need to spend all the time you did typing out all that pointless stuff for my sake either... but you did... and it entertained me. That's all that matters. Thanks.

p.s. Posting anonymously on my blog means you are not "someone I don't know"... you are the same "anonymous" who comes on here 2 or 3 times a day, posts the same pointless claptrap, and gets toyed with (or ignored, or deleted... depending on my mood) the same way that you usually get. I can't see why you would be suprised this time. It's only happened to you about 50 times before. The only "guests" in my house have names. Everything else, like you, are merely props.