Payday yesterday, so shopping and paying bills today. Now broke again until next payday. Sigh.
Tatay (my father-in-law, Eddie) is now guarding our house at night. He mostly just sleeps on the front porch, but we have the "official" guard outside the fence. Tyson guards too. Tatay is up at 5:00 every morning though, cleaning the house from rooftop to front walk. Throughout the day he putters as well.
Momma is her usual feisty self. Due to a longstanding animosity between her and Epril's best friend, Fatima (likely due to the teenager of ten years ago enticing Epril out to eat too much sugar, wink at boys, wear makeup, and listen to Chuck Berry records), she finally chased Fatima out of the house in tears with disparaging remarks. Unfortunately, Fatima's boyfriend Mark, a good friend of mine, left as well, and that pisses me off. They had been staying in the spare room for the last 4 months. (Momma also chases off any and all of Susan's boyfriends on a regular basis, hence Susan's inability to find a husband.)
I figured that Momma never was going to like Fatima — with Mark being collateral damage — so I just let it happen to clear the air. This was 6 months in the making. I'm not going to get involved in Susan's affairs, so that's not my concern; however, as much as I hate to say it, the next time Momma chases one of my friends out of my house or makes people feel unwelcome, she will be asked to leave. Unfortunately, Momma has an extremely long list of people she dislikes, so this is likely going to happen eventually. It's a 50-50 probability that if asked to leave, Momma will decide to become more friendly and Christian to our friends and guests, or an equal probability that she'll just leave in a huff and not talk to us again (like she has before).
Let's see... who else? Young Doreen started preschool recently. I've nicknamed her Buckwheat because of her smile and her uncanny ability to be simultaneously cute and annoying.
Kid sister Dimple is still the brains of the family, studying hard in 3rd grade and speaking English well. She comes up and sits next to me while I work and rests her head on my arm.
Crystal (nicknamed "Inday", which means "kid sister", but she's getting a little old for that moniker, being 13 years old) is becoming a real beauty, but she is a bit of a gadabout and will disappear with her friends after school until late in the evening. Obviously that infuriates Momma to no end... purposefully or accidentally, I can only guess.
Ednil is now going to the local community college for hotel and restaurant management. She seems to be enjoying it, studying hard, making friends, and engaging in some clubs at the school as well. I think I'll upgrade her category from "shy" to "the quiet one."
Epril is interested in beauty tips now and watches YouTube for makeup lessons. I was the one who originally got her into dresses and makeup, and she is quite the duck to water in that regard. About other things though she is a little bit ADHD-ish. I'm thinking maybe she would like to go to study cosmetology or something.
Susan is spending most of her time doing the laundry and cooking the meals. This coming week she is going to start putting down a hard-and-fast pizza recipe for the little pizza stand we are going to make and will be giving out samples. The money she makes from that should go towards food and clothes and other stuff for the family.
Tyson is now 50% good dog and 50% bad dog. He's smart too... or at least wily as all hell. He makes conscious decisions to behave; he knows what he is supposed to do and then makes a decision to do it, not based on reward or punishment but really based on right or wrong (and his desire to be right or wrong) it seems.
He really can't be bribed with treats even: Last night, Tyson was hanging out under the dinner table waiting for food to fall. Susan tried to get Tyson outside by holding a piece of chicken in her hand and slowly backing towards the door. Tyson was all interested until he realized that if he took the chicken, he would wind up outside where he didn't want to be, and went back under the table, and had to be pulled out manually. (Maybe next time he'll make the right choice, eh?)
I've actually been letting Tyson run around the neighborhood loose, and he's very good about staying away from people... I think because he knows he scares them: Anyone who pays him positive attention he will come up to slowly, wearing his biggest smile (he has really perfected the "dog smile", I must say); anyone who shies away from him he shies away from in turn. He's also fairly good about not straying too far. However, sometimes he gets confused or starts following his nose and winds up in other people's yards or living rooms. Usually this is because he is just trying to make friends with another dog in the neighborhood, who retreats from Tyson's playful overtures in the street — or (accidentally?) invites Tyson in — to the safety and comfort of their masters' property: Tyson follows right along, and I wind up in a kitchen down the street pulling Tyson out from under the table while my patient and politely smiling neighbors listen to my apologies.
I've also finally found a way to really exercise Tyson: I'll take him out to the street, get on my motorcycle, and drive down the street while he sprints alongside. We'll go 200 yards down the street at 20 miles per hour, 400 yards up the street, and then 200 yards back to the house. In the span of 3 minutes, Tyson is done and dusted — and, for the moment, the happiest and most exhausted dog in the world.
Anyway, everyone is happy now and at peace. The days come and the days go, and my family and I are moving through them without much expectation of drastic turns for the worse nor better.
Knock on wood.
Wow! I did not realize that you had so many people living there. What is the number up to now?
ReplyDeleteI'm with you about Mama. Be as persnickety as you like, but you can't chase off my friends!
Thanks for all the info on your family, Jil.
ReplyDeleteHow come Eddie is now helping Tyson in his job? Have things gotten worse?
YLM
Tom,
ReplyDeleteIt's really just myself and Epril, Susan in the living room, Ednil in the spare room (now that Fatima and Mark have left), and Tatay on the front porch... 5 people. Momma, Inday, Dimple, and Doreen sleep at the family house in Barangay Kimaya. (About 50% of the time actually, Doreen sleeps here... so 5½ people.)
And, of course, I don't want Mamma chasing off just my friends, but Epril's friends as well... who are the people whom she tends to hold the lowest opinions of.
Mom,
Eddie (Tatay) likes being our guard, and I think the chair on the front porch is a more comfortable place for him to stay.
Sorry you have to have someone in front of the house at night to make sure things are ok. Probably not much different than living in the US but there in the US you really couldn't afford to have a gaurd....
ReplyDeleteJil,
ReplyDeleteJust so you know, inday doesnt meen little sister, it means like Miss here in American.
Younger sister would be, Manghod nga babae. Just brother or sister would be igsoon.
Thanks for the info, Anon.
ReplyDeleteWhat does "atay" and "kuya" mean? Big sister and big brother, respectively?
Jil,
ReplyDeleteKuya is older brother. However your other word needs a bit of work lol.
Atay = Liver or depending how it is said it can meen a expression kinda the equivilant of damn it in America. hehehe
The word your looking for for older sister is Ate not atay.
After nearly 2 yrs there you should know bisaya by now. Earlier this year I know it was brought up on yalls expat page to start a bisaya lesson group but it seems it reached the level of talking only and didnt achieve implementation.
Anyway , Inday meens like Miss here in America and has nothing to do with kid sister unless its simply a term of enderment within your wifes family, kinda like how us southern folk call our big brothers Bubba.
Anon,
ReplyDeleteIt's true that I should have learned more Bisayan by now... but for some reason, it doesn't seem to stick. I'm guessing that I've tried to cram one too many languages into my gourd and can't fit any more. I learned French, Spanish, and Latin in High School, learned Portuguese when I was in Brazil, German in college, and then Thai while I was living in Thailand. Seems I just can't fit another language in.
Heck: I was out walking the dog with Epril the last few nights, and say "good evening" to all the people in Bisayan, and she still has to remind me every 3 or 4 minutes how to say it properly: Ma'a gabii or something like that. See? Forgotten it already... after being told 20 times.
Jil,
ReplyDeleteMy thought is it harder on expats to learn bisaya because well all the locals (or at least the educated ones) speak english and talk to white people in english even if the whites learn bisaya so not really a learn or die incentive going on unlike in other countries where even many highly educated ppl dont bother learning english. For example I live only a short ways from the Mexican border and in the bordertowns even many of the doctors and dentist dont speak english. Maybe thats what makes it harder to learn bisaya but did put allot of effort into it and think you could learn if applied yourself to the task or hired a teacher to instruct you. I know theres a few schools there that teach missionaries using a 2yr course that focuses on both language and culture.
Jil,
ReplyDeleteForgot to add, I think what your trying to say is maayong gabii (good evening) but you can also change the gabii to buntag, udto or hapon depending on time of day.
I agree that laziness is part of it. When I learned Thai, I studied books and made flashcards and made it a point to sit down and learn the language. I also agree that being able to speak English to pretty much everyone here is another reason why I haven't learned the language.
ReplyDeleteThird, I have a hobby that is interfering with that as well: I've been studying English vocabulary. They say that the average American knows between 15,000 and 20,000 words. I gave myself the benefit of the doubt and placed myself at 20,000 words 2 years ago. My goal is to learn 30,000 words in the next 30 years and have the largest vocabulary of any English speaker on earth: 50,000 words. So far, I've only learned 1,400 new words. It's not as easy as you think to actually find, learn, and remember (over the long term, which is my rule to "knowing" a word) 3 new words per day, every day, but hopefully I make the goal. It's enjoyable and keeps my brain active.