Daily Report: The Mysterious Faces I See

Epril and I went out to the Turkish restaurant at SM today for lunch. We hadn't been there in a while. I had a wonderful fried rice with nuts and raisins, some chicken wrap (skip the sauce if you try it), and a bit of potato salad.

In the evening we went out to Spooks to hang out with friends and have a few beers. Then, a quick stop at McDonalds, and then home to watch Wall-E on DVD, which we purchased earlier in the day after lunch.

During the day today, I saw at SM shopping mall eight different foreigners whom I had never seen before. While at McDonald's, I saw another two, and on the way home yet another. That's 11, if you weren't keeping count... about the same number as was hanging out at Spooks tonight. Two of the foreigners I saw in SM were walking together, the rest were by themselves, or with Filipina ladies. Take note that this isn't particularly different than an average day here, even though this can still be called "the holidays".

This is one of the strangest aspects of the expatriate population in Cagayan De Oro: A very large majority of expatriates here don't socialize. It's weird because they have something very much in common with any foreigner here: They've flown halfway around the world to a very small, very secluded place, with very different experiences, and they've done it primarily by themselves... not as part of a package tour. What's more, if they are here, they are probably visiting for at least weeks at a time... and they are probably the only foreigner in their house. To not spend any of their time here getting to know other people in similar circumstances... to not share this major aspect of their life with others who are experiencing the same thing... to simply not be interested in getting out of the house and finding what other expatriates do, think, or know... it's actually a bit more than strange, it's kind of sad.

I've heard it estimated at the immigration office that there are 200 expatriates here in Cagayan De Oro at any given time. My most-social-of-them-all circle of friends numbers about 20, with another 20 who float in and out every couple of weeks, and another 10 or so who are seasonal. That leaves 75% of all foreigners in town whom I don't know or at least don't recognize. Probably one third of those are non-English-speaking, so they can be excused for not coming and hanging out at the thrice-weekly chin-wags. That leaves half — 100 or so — expatriates who never ever get to know the other expatriates in town. (Or at least face to face; perhaps they spend all their time sitting in their houses, sending messages to the Yahoo groups. That in itself is a bit strange in a Joseph Merrick kind of way.)

If you're one of those 100 people here in Cagayan who doesn't get out of the house and visit with the other expatriates, and you're reading, I don't know what your reasoning is. I certainly hope it's not arrogance, laziness, or some antisocial mental disorder. Well, I hope to meet you people some day.

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Just as an afterthought, maybe I'll start going up to those guys I see at the mall and invite them out to the weekly get-togethers. Maybe all of us who do go out should start carrying around a couple of business cards from Spooks (Friday night), Kingston Lodge (Sunday afternoon), and Phileas Fogg's (Wednesday morning) to hand out. Maybe the reason why some of these people never show up is because nobody ever invites them.